Psalm 46:10

I wasn't sure how personal I wanted to be on this blog, but I've decided to go ahead and blog about what I've been working on in my quiet time today. I don't know yet if I'm doing this for myself or someone else. I'm not sure if I need to tell ya'll what I'm up to because I need to be vulnerable and I need accountability, or if I'm writing this to encourage someone else and allow God to work in their life through this blog. All I know is that I'm a big time introvert and it's pretty scary to open up and be honest like this for me.

Yesterday I decided to fast from TV and radio through Sunday at the earliest. I feel like there's a lot going on right now - the house not selling, losing my pt babysitting job, trying to find a spiritual mentor, etc. I'm not actually overly stressed or worried about it, I just feel like I need God's guidance right now and I need to make sure I'm on the right path. I truly believe that I am very blessed - I feel close to God, and I have a terrific husband, the best baby in the whole world, a wonderful church family, a great extended family, a roof over my head, and a fairly decent amount of savings, to name a few of the blessings. I know things could be tons and tons worse, but I also feel like I could and should be a better person and I am seeking God and His wisdom and direction.

The verse that came to me last night was Psalm 46: Be Still and Know that I am God. At first, I thought it was just to remind me of my fast - be silent and listen. But the more I dug into it today, I realized that's not exactly what it means. I read through all of Psalm 46 and then googled it. I liked one particular devotion lots. It explained how being still means to be slack, weak, drop our hands, go limp, chill out. I like that so much better then simply being silent. The devotion uses phrases like: "reliance upon God," "enjoying a calm confidence in Him," and "as your world crumbles around you... don't flinch in your Faith in God." While I don't think my world is crumbling by any means, I find it very uplifting and a great reminder of how awesome and powerful our God is. The bible notes on Psalm 46 say: "He will not fail to rescue those who love Him." That's just so amazing and so wonderful to hear. He is so much bigger then me and my house and our income and I know He will take care of us. "God is always there to help, providing refuge, security, and peace." I'm not going to worry - if our house is supposed to sell, it will. God will help us make ends meet until it does or else He'll help us become super creative and even more frugal then we are now. And until then, we'll enjoy being close to Ryan's grandparents, and we'll continue loving and serving Him through Mountain Lake from afar.